A Little Trepidation and a LOT of Faith and Hope

In less than 7 hours we will be checking Shayla in to St. Al's (Alphonsus) and starting off a long day. I am glad we had today (Sunday) to attend church and be rejuvenated spiritually as well as rest and re-energize physically. We are all going to need it!

There is a little bit of "normal" worry, but not much. The surgery will be pretty intense for Shayla and she will be quite swollen afterwards. However, Dr. Beck feels confident that she will be able to do all of the surgery from the underside of Shayla's lip and possibly inside her nostrils, so there will be no facial incisions. If any exterior cuts need to be made, it would only be a small one on the inside of the bridge of Shayla's nose, but that would only be if Dr. Beck cannot get access to the whole tumor site from below.

More than anything else, I feel grateful we are to this point. Almost 1/2 way through the chemo and the tumor will be removed! Any palate removal can be repaired in the future with bone grafting once Shayla is deemed cured of her cancer (5 years hence) and she will have a very normal life! I am grateful Shayla has not had to deal with a lot of chemo sickness. She has been blessed.

Shayla is quite courageous. She is always presenting a strong countenance. But don't let that fool you. She is 'normal' in the sense of some fear of the unknown and even a little of the known. I am grateful she is so strong, but I am grateful that she can cry too. Crying together has actually made us stronger in the moment of adversity.

We are full of hope and faith that the surgery will come off fabulously. The best news will come after about a week once the pathology is complete on the tumor and surrounding tissue. Clear margins will mean no need for proton beam radiation. That's what we are praying for tonight, among other things.

Even though what we have experienced would not be considered 'light' by any sttretch of the imagination, we are keenly aware in our close church family and extended friends and family that there are others experiencing much more challenging trials. I can close my eyes and see the faces of many friends in my own little corner of the world who need our prayers too. I am grateful to still have eyes to see beyond myself and my family's circumstances. The Lord, in His wisdom, has counseled us to lift up the arms that hang low, and in so doing we actually find strength to meet our own challenges.

Shayla's siblings are being just as strong as she is. They don't ask a lot of questions, and when Mom and Dad need to be gone with Shayla, they don't complain. Instead, they have learned to 'go with the flow' of the day trying hard not to be demanding even when they have things they would like to do. I wish I could be in more than one place at a time. Sometimes the best anyone can do is tell our kids we love them and hold them, if only for just a minute.

I am rattling on now, it is time to get some sleep. More will be posted tomorrow as we have news to report. Your prayers and fasting are so appreciated! We know God has heard them thus far and gratefully has seen fit to bless us with those things for which we have asked. Have faith. He knows what is best for Shayla and will hold her in the palm of His perfect hand.